Oh Dear God!

MQ, you are absolutely right, if I click on the picture it gets MUCH bigger and more detailed. The internet now has the opportunity to know more about my dirty baseboards than I ever imagined. In fact, my damn baseboards are dirtier than I ever imagined. And I pride myself on having a pretty good imagination. It just usually involves a lot more Johnny Depp in the south of France and a lot fewer baseboards. About the same amount of dirt, though...

And here are a few thoughts on winter skin:

We're heading into spring...according to the sunny skies and calendar if not the actual temperature outdoors. I am craving the opportunity to wear my new tissue thin spring aqua Old Navy dress, but I'm still having to wear a full-length coat to work and preheat my car in the morning so I don't freeze to death just backing down my driveway. So, what's a girl to do? I am focusing on my full body moisturization routine so that when I can show some skin, it won't be winter dry. One of my very favorite style bloggers, ASJINE (http://www.aseriousjobisnoexcuse.blogspot.com/), posted about that very subject back during the depths of winter. She advocates moisturizing three times a day--when you get up in the morning, when you get home from work, and before you go to bed. Now, I can just see the looks on my family's faces if I tried disappearing into my bedroom to slather on lotion when I got home. I can also picture the way they would break down the door to get to me if I tried it--HEE! Seriously, I don't have the time/am not willing to make the time to be so dedicated, so I have discovered a shortcut. OIL (thar's gold in them thar hills!) I've been mixing body oil in with my body moisturizer--I do moisturize twice a day, before getting dressed for work and before going to bed, and I've been using anything from Neutrogena Body Oil to Bio Oil to Seacret Dead Sea Minerals Cuticle Oil, just squirting my usual palmful of lotion and then adding a few drops of oil to it. I've been amazed at the results, even my husband has commented on how soft my skin is, particularly the parts that don't usually see the sun like my butt and inner thighs.
And for MY HUSBAND to notice a difference in my physical appearance, that's like (tries to think of something really unusual, gives up search for fantastic metaphor and settles for a brief noting that it is after 9PM and thus my brain, I mean, coach, is fast metamorphosing into a Native American gourd whose seeds are tasty when toasted)

I am learning already!

Monday when I got dressed I considered adding a chunky black necklace but decided it might be too much with the bold print of the top, so I didn't put it on, but looking at the pictures, I think that necklace could take that outfit to the next level. Have made mental notation for the next time I break it out (and I do find it amazing that I can remember things like that but my brain is a complete black hole for people's names).

Yesterday was a black low cowlnecked dress from Lane Bryant (bought 2-3 years ago) with a black camisole underneath as that neckline allows me to see my own navel, which I personally LOVE but doubt that my manager at work would, black opaque tights and my new and FABulous Carlos Santana "Fuse" boots in leopard printed ponyhair with red patent leather 4.25 inch heels and 1/2 inch platform. I LOVE THOSE BOOTS. My feet, howevah, don't feel quite so in charity with me by day's end. Feet, you will have to suck! it! up!

I believe that a dress truly showcases amazing heels as most pants cannot. I recieved compliments on my boots yesterday wherever I went. Most times I shy away from animal prints, as they can have too much of a "retired in Florida wanna see my batwings?" vibe, but I feel that the red patent leather offsets any possibility of that happening!

GAH--AM LATE!!!

Here's To YOU, Madame Queen!

It's time for me to dip my toe in the water, expose myself to internet humiliation, and post pictures of myself for strangers to guffaw at. As well as honing my dangling participle skillz. Allie (http://www.whatsmywardrobetoday.blogspot/ and http://www.wardrobeoxygen.com/) has been inspiring me for years with her ability to take an "average" (she is anything but) woman on an "average" budget and look fabulously stylish. I think every woman wants to look that way--well, ALMOST every woman...there are a couple of dykes (I use that word in the most loving and politically correct way possible) in my office that need to be held down and have all Polo shirts forcibly removed from their closets...but I digress.

I LOVE DIGRESSION! Especially when I am really nervous.



Here's what I hope to gain through this experience: I am very critical of the way others look. I am that woman whispering to her companion after you pass, "My God did you see how that red handbag clashed with those ugly shoes?" And yet, I know that every time I walk out of the house, I would not be passing Cojo's muster. So in posting of myself every day in all of my outfits, it should help me learn what is most flattering to my body. I know that certain dresses provoke certain reactions, and I want to know more about why.



A little about myself: I'm 35, 2 kids, a ten year old boy, Zac, and 4 year old girl, Lynda Elean. My husband and I have been together off and on for ten years, we finally tied the knot in 2006 at the Birmingham Botanical Gardens. I am tall (6 feet even) but heavy (hell no I will not be posting my weight, suffice it to say I swing between an 18/20 and a 12/14, around a fourteen right now and trying to get back down to a 12). As for my budget, let me say, HA HA. I buy a lot of dresses at Walmart and a lot of shoes on eBay. It's VERY RARE for me to walk into a mall and pay full retail price for anything. I recently applied to be a DeLush reviewer and that would be a dream come true, free products! I use drugstore stuff and exfoliate, exfoliate, exfoliate my nasty oily skin that loves to break out. I read in Six Weeks To Sensational Skin about a dermatologist that shaved his whole face every day and I started doing that in addition to my scrubs and microdermasion cloth. Honestly, I just cannot exfoliate enough! I loveLoveLOVE to see that pink healthy glow.

Well, here goes. Zac is my official paparazzi and we will be trying different locations around the house in different lighting to see what works best, I know these suck.

Gah. I swear I am not pregnant. I guess I will be learning more about posing for the lens as well, as a mom I am much more accustomed to being on the other side!
Lane Bryant shirt from Fall 2007 size 14, Lane Bryant pants from Fall 2007 also size 14, black leather Bebe peeptoe platforms off eBay that are the most wonderfully comfortable heels I own. And me, I own a LOTTA heels.
This was taken when I got home from work and apparently I don't have any makeup left on, but I started with Prescriptives custom blended powder, Revlon Renewist Lipstick in Berry Fulfilling, and eyelashes curled with Cover Girl LashBlast applied. Oh, and eyebrows groomed with a mostly empty tube of Lancome Extencils mascara. No jewelry except for my wedding set.

Thanks, Madame Queen (http://www.themadamequeen.blogspot.com/) for encouraging me to get started with this--I've been wanting to do it for actually a couple of years, but your requests provided the impetus I needed to actually sit here and do this instead of getting ready for work--HEE!!!

Have a great day, ya'll.